History Schistory, April 19: Drake sinks Armada

1587 - Sir Frances Drake sails into Cadiz Spain & sinks Spanish fleet, which shifts the balance of power in the world away from Spain and toward England and France. How did he ever manage to sink such a huge car? Oh, wait, the car is named after the fleet, not the other way around.  Got it!

History Schmistory: April 18. The Euro is born.

On April 18, 1999, The Euro became the official currency of 11 European countries. Terms like “Eurotrash” and “Euronerd” are now worth more money.

History Schmistory: April 17. Martin Luther Faces Diet of Worms.

1521. Martin Luther went before the Diet of Worms to face charges stemming from his religious writings. Didn’t go so great for Luther. If you faced a Diet of Worms, how well do you think it would go for you?

History Schmistory: April 16. First Woman to Fly Across English Channel.

1912. Harriet Quimby became the first woman to fly across the English Channel. British historians were quoted saying: “Finally, a bird flies south!”

History Schmistory: April 15. Czechoslovakia goes Schizo!

1993. Czechoslovakia peacefully split into two new countries, the Czech Republic and Slovakia. The Czech Republic gets the house and Slovakia gets the car.

History Schmistory: April 13. Edict of Nantes.

1598. King Henry IV of France signed the Edict of Nantes, granting rights to the Protestant Huguenots. No truth to the rumor they got their name from enemies saying “You are HUGE–NOT!”

History Schmistory, March 30: Hank wants a new toy!

1533 – Henry VIII divorces his 1st wife, Catherine of Aragon, which leads to the creation of the Anglican church, lots of bloody history over the next hundred years, and several good Shakespeare plays.
Hank

History Schmistory, March 29: Beethoven Rolls Over!

1795 – Beethoven (age 24) debuts as pianist in Vienna.

History Schmistory, March 28: Mona Winks!

1794 – The Louvre Museum in Paris opens to the public.
Leonardo Da Viinci's Masterpiece.  Not.

History Schmistory, March 26: What do you think of our government, baby?

1871 – Paris Commune, often said to be the first example of working people taking power, is founded.The commune ended after just two months. Great veggie meals and ultimate frisbee, but, unfortunately, no one wanted to do the dishes or clean the bathrooms.

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