History Schmistory: December 9. These Woods Rock!
Monday, December 9, 2013
1962: The Petrified Forest National Park is established in Arizona. Local trees are too petrified to speak.
History Schmistory: December 7. “We’ve been expecting you”
Saturday, December 7, 2013
1995: The Galileo spacecraft arrives at Jupiter more than six years after it was launched by Space Shuttle Atlantis. Jupiter bakes a cake.
History Schmistory: December 6. We’re number one!
Friday, December 6, 2013
1884: The Washington Monument in Washington D.C. is completed. Today it remains the tallest stone structure ever built, as well as the tallest obelisk. It took over 36 years to complete, and 106 years to crack in a Virginia earthquake. Uncle Sam denies any symbolism in the damaged symbol.
History Schmistory: November 30. Jersey Shake.
Saturday, November 30, 2013
1783: A magnitude 5.3 earthquake strikes New Jersey, the largest in the state’s history. Citizens threaten to punch the earth in the face.
History Schmistory: November 29. Going South.
Friday, November 29, 2013
1929: U.S. Admiral Richard Byrd becomes the first person to fly over the South Pole. Say, if Santa Claus lives in the North Pole, then who lives in the South Pole? Could it be…
History Schmistory: November 28. “Someone should invent the windshield.”
Thursday, November 28, 2013
1895: The first American automobile race takes place along a 54 mile stretch between Chicago’s Jackson Park and Evanston, Illinois. In a little over 10 hours, Frank Duryea wins by a two hour nose. Here we see the thrill of their victory…
History Schmistory: November 26. “Someone’s here… Places!”
Tuesday, November 26, 2013
1922: Howard Carter and Lord Carnarvon become the first people to enter the tomb of Pharaoh Tutankhamun (“King Tut”) in over 3000 years, giving the King ample time to perfect his moment in the spotlight…
History Schmistory: November 25. “Take my money, just make it stop!”
Monday, November 25, 2013
1984: In a Band-Aid charity event, 36 top musicians gather in a Notting Hill studio and pretend to enjoy singing Do They Know It’s Christmas to raise money for famine relief in Ethiopia. While it was certainly a great cause for Ethiopia, the only thing it caused elsewhere was severe auditory hemorrhaging.
History Schmistory: November 24. Gone Apey.
Sunday, November 24, 2013
1859: Charles Darwin publishes On the Origin of Species, introducing the scientific theory of natural selection, which suggests, among many things, that humans evolved from apes. Many tempers flare, while other imaginations run wild!
…Okay, that’s too wild.
History Schmistory: November 23. Music to your ear-holes.
Saturday, November 23, 2013
1889: The first jukebox goes into operation at the Palais Royale Saloon in San Francisco. Originally named the “nickel-in-the-slot-player”, the machine caused a such a sensation that people didn’t even mind exchanging earwax…
